(HOST) Given a choice between the two biggest political stories of the day, commentator Bill Seamans will take the one – with the tail.
(SEAMANS) As they recover from their Post Election Stress Disorder our pundits seem to be focussing these days on two stories – the financial crisis and the future White House Dog.
The economic crisis is so bad that Tom Friedman of the New York Times says he doesn’t get invited out to dinner as often these days because he insists on talking about the need to convene a special session of Congress, move the inauguration up to Thanksgiving Day, cancel lavish inaugural balls and the huge grandstand as unnecessary and too expensive amid a financial crisis, and that we should swear in Barack Obama right now. Since I cannot add anything more to Friedman’s comments I’ll take the easier Flat Earth path to the First Dog story.
And there’s also problem there because the Obamas’ older daughter has an allergy problem and the Obamapup must be a hypoallergenic breed that does not shed. Dog hair roots carry skin dander which aggravates an allergy. Many suggestions have been offered by the pundits, and the American Kennel Club has come up with a survey in which over forty-thousand members voted for the poodle as the best choice among the five hypoallergenic breeds. I think the miniature poodle would seem to be the ideal White House size – 26 to 30 pounds and up to 15 inches tall – small enough for romping with the children and big enough to show up well during those helicopter greeting scenes….
Whatever breed is chosen we can only wonder whether the new First Dog will reach the celebrity of Fala, FDR’s beloved Scottie, the only White House dog enshrined with his master in a Washington Monument. Then another Scottie, President Bush’s Barney who expressed current White House sentiment when he bit the hand of a reporter. President Nixon’s dog Checkers reached TV fame in that famous speech by his master. And in this political bookathon era we cannot forget Millie, the springer spaniel who dictated a book about her canine career to Barbara Bush that earned $900,000 for charity…..
Now after the new First Dog is chosen we can expect that the pundits will launch a tsunami of commentary about what the new member of Obama’s Inner Circle should be named… Children will mail in tons of postcards, talking tv heads will discuss the problem hour after hour. Obama’s hardline political opponents will say – "Well, at least he kept one campaign promise!" And it will provide us all with some relief from all that other stuff…
So let’s see now – what should they name the new First Puppy?